The introduction of home technology has made it easier to access pornography. One simple access can commence a chain reaction where it becomes a harder to break the habit. Addiction to pornography is just that – an addiction. Because it’s effect on the person is stronger than just being a habit.
“Many wives found their husbands preferring fantasy sex rather than making love with them, their partner. One of my (patient) wives, in great pain, confronted her husband, “What do you see in those two- dimensional, faceless women that I can’t give you as a loving wife, who is flesh and blood, a real person and committed to you?” The men never had an answer. To some extent they enjoyed intimate relations with their wives, but most preferred the fantasy sex with masturbation because these ‘fantasy women’ could do anything and were perfect in form and appearance! While some wives initially blamed themselves as possibly being responsible for their husband’s problem, they soon found that being extra affectionate with the husband never solved anything or stopped the “acting out” behaviour or the constant lies and deception.”– Victor B. Cline, PhD 2000 Families under Fire Conference.
It is similar to being addicted to a drug – in stage 1 you take the drug, in stage 2 you experience feelings of euphoria, in stage 3 you experience withdrawal, and in stage 4 you desire to feel good again – and since that drug offers the promise of euphoria, you are drawn into the cycle of addiction.
This means that it’s harder to stop a pornography habit than we might think – it’s akin to coming off a drug addiction! Because you are not merely trying to stop an activity – but trying to break an established cycle of addiction.
There is a Road to Healing – Arrange an information session in your church or community.
Dr Peter Powell runs a one day Professional Development Day for Psychologists and counsellors interested in learning more about treatment for those using child and adult exploitive material (pornography)
If you are interested in attending one of these days please email your expression of interest.